This is my story, of how I came to start writing this blog. I write this mainly for those who have known me, and might be wondering just what the heck happened that I started writing about all this spiritual stuff that may seem fantastic and ridiculous.
I basically started out as an atheist. I went to church with my family, but by puberty I identified with my intellect, and I dismissed anything associated with religion or spirituality. I developed, on my own, a rational, intellectual, left-brain perspective on such matters. People used to believe in magical stuff because they didn’t know any better, and religion and fanciful stuff was like Santa Claus. You believed it until you figured out that it wasn’t real, and grown-ups knew better. Being smart and being right became very important to me!
I never believed in Santa as a child. What is striking to me now was that no one had to tell me that Santa wasn’t real. I discerned that a person couldn’t do what they claimed Santa could do. I knew there wasn’t any kind of magic or rational explanation whereby someone could fit down our chimney, I knew it wasn’t possible to travel around the world in one night, and I knew that my plastic, packaged toys weren’t made in a workshop at the North Pole. None of that made any sense to me. I grew to come to the same conclusion about much of what I was taught about my Catholic religion.
The first weird thing I learned
The first thing I took in that was spirituality-related, or “woo-woo” as it gets labeled, was the Human Design system, which was introduced to me by an acquaintance not long after I got my Bachelor’s degree. For whatever reason, this system, a synthesis of Astrology, the I Ching, the Chakras, and the Tree of Life, made intuitive sense to me. I see this now as a product of my gift of claircognizance; I had a feeling that just said ‘yes’ to it.
What I got from learning about Human Design was this–perhaps that unproven stuff that flaky people believe in actually had some sort of physical reality underlying it; maybe it was real, and our institutions that employ the scientific method merely had not yet figured out what was going on there due to lack of investigation.
One thing I had to resolve for myself was the origin story of Human Design–it was received. This guy heard a voice, a higher intelligence, telling him to start writing. Over the next eight days, he received the information that formed the basis of the Human Design system. What struck me about Human Design was that it had an elegance to it. It was so complex, and the pieces fit together in such a beautiful way that I knew it could not merely be the product of a human imagination coming up with fiction–no writer is that good.
So from that experience, I developed a sense that there is a bigger picture out there, forces of intelligence that are way beyond mere human intellect. And I left it at that.
Rock bottom and upwards
Fast-forward eight years, and I was going through a low point in my life. I was depressed and an addict, so I sought out counselling therapy to address my issues. As part of my recovery, I started attending 12 Steps meetings. My marriage ended, and I was basically at rock bottom, so I started taking the 12 Steps seriously, and began the work of addressing my wounds with forgiveness. It took me a while to surrender my will to a higher power, but when I did, I felt a warm glow in what I now know is my heart chakra.
In March of 2015, I attended my first Essence of Being workshop, a three-day weekend experiential workshop based on the teachings of Buckminster Fuller among others, where participants have the opportunity to heal old wounds in a safe, loving environment. By the third day, I could feel a major difference in my heart chakra–I was feeling self-love like I’d never felt before. Upon returning to my regular life, I fell into a deep depression which I now recognize as a Dark Night of the Soul. I arranged a phone call with Burge Smith-Lyons, who runs the EoB workshops, and we determined through muscle testing that I am an empath, and that I had multiple energies inside my body. A few weeks later, I was able to reconnect with my heart and my depression lifted.
At some point in 2015, I heard people at a 12 Steps meeting talk about Law of Attraction, which led me to discovering Abraham Hicks. I began listening to Abraham Q&A sessions on YouTube. This opened my mind to the possibility of channeling. I hadn’t thought much of it before, but I liked what was being said, that we create our own reality. I came across Jane Roberts and Seth shortly thereafter. This expanded my “frame of reality” considerably; I started taking seriously the existence of spirits and non-physical entities.
Encounters with Spirit
In January 2016 I had my first encounter with a non-physical entity with whom I could communicate. I was in bed at around midnight on a Sunday when I heard my cat wailing; it sounded like a cry of distress. I turned the light on to find the cat frozen on the stairs, staring up into the space above him. I felt a chill run through me, and all my hairs stood on end–there was entity in the space, and it began moving towards me and inside me. I was terrified, so I did a tapping exercise that I learned from Burge whereby I could banish from my body and energy field any energies that were not mine.
The next day, my fear had subsided, and I started wondering about the energy and what it wanted. So that night, I put out the intention to communicate with the spirit and invited it back. I asked if it was someone I knew, and I got a strong ‘yes’ in response. I saw a face form in my mind; it turned out to be the spirit of my old university roommate. A few months before this encounter I had learned that he had been dead for ten years. He was seeking forgiveness, and I gave it.
It turns out that my intuitive gifts allowed for spirit to be able to move parts of my body gently. Shortly thereafter I connected with Abraham–like with Esther Hicks, they spelled out their name with my nose. Over the course of 2016, I had contact with many different Spirits, and I began to learn how to use my intuitive gifts. I discovered the Kryon materials, and began reading all I could about spirituality. I discovered that there are many people around the world who were having a similar awakening. I learned that there is indeed a purpose and meaning to our lives here on Earth.
Writing this blog
This brings me to March 2017, and I received the inspiration to start writing about what I’ve learned. I discovered that there are many sources of information about this stuff, so in the interest of disclosure, here are the online sources from which I’ve learned what I know:
- Love Your Design, by Kim Gould. www.loveyourdesign.com
- Abraham, through Esther Hicks. www.abraham-hicks.com
- Seth, through Jane Roberts. www.sethlearningcenter.org, sethcenter.com
- Kryon, through Lee Carroll. www.kryon.com. Through David Brown. www.kryon.org.za
- Archangel Michael, through Ronna Herman. www.ronnastar.com
- Ascension Glossary/Energetic Synthesis, by Lisa Renee. ascensionglossary.com, www.energeticsynthesis.com
- Jeshua, through Pamela Kribbe. www.jeshua.net
- Messages from God, thorugh Yael Powell. www.circleoflight.net
Like us individual, differentiated humans, these sources from beyond each have their own perspective and emphases. But they’re all telling aspects of the same big story. In my writings, I aim to share what I’ve learned about this big story through the filter of my intellect and my inspiration.